a search for character.. seeking meaning of life.. losing naivete in the process..

Semi-state of shock..

Something really big happened at work today..my marketing department buddy was "asked to leave".. I was shocked..

It took me a long while to register the fact that she, in fact is leaving the very min.. packed her stuff and all..

I was feeling torn.. one side, i dunno if i should be happy that i wasnt the one being asked to leave.. on the other side, im sad to see her go.. and at the back of my head was.. "will it happen to me sometime soon?"

i landed in the state of fear.. now, the inexperience monkey (that's me) will head all of angie's A&P, manage all joint promotions and be the only solo person in the marketing department.. on top of that.. the retail outlets.. the retail management.. sponsorships.. corporate accounts.. sales.. (oh.. i happen to be the in-house designer too..) argh, can i manage?

Many assured that i can do it.. I thank them for their confidence in me.. but my confidence has been shattered just days ago... im not too sure of myself now.. not so sure about my work... not so sure where i should be heading and my future looks bleak.. not sure how i should pick myself up from where i am and proceed to the journey ahead..

challenges are interesting, but i'm no longer game for them. at least for now.. this has been a big shock to me..

i need to gather my thoughts.. think about what i have to do and get done..

for now, i intend to get things off my mind and do something i enjoy.. let tomorrow worry by itself for the moment.. got to get over the shock.