a search for character.. seeking meaning of life.. losing naivete in the process..

painful butt..

I almost couldnt believe it myself.. i sat in a salon for 7 straight hours!! my butt hurts so much.. and legs are numb from sitting too much..

i rebonded my hair @ Hair Plus Salon (Far East Plaza Level 2) today.. i was really satisfied with the results tho.. my poor hair has been through so many hair shows in the past and it's so badly damaged that not many stylists would dare to rebond it for me.. imagine having virgin hair, bleached hair and colored hair all mixed up.. and there are so many steps to prevent more damage to the hair..

despite the long hours i sat in there.. and the expensive price that i had to pay(coz i did color touch-up and many treatments for my poorly damaged hair).. my hair looks so much neater now.. and healthier.. i would definitely recommend anyone who wants to go for rebonding to go there.. i know perming is the trend now.. but not everyone suits that kind of hairstyle.. haha..

poor wei.. he was sitting there waiting patiently for 7 straight hours for me to finish rebonding my hair.. thanks dar.. i know you have been bored to death and wasted one whole precious day doing nothing there..

anyway, it's time for bed.. brother bugging me to return his computer.. and i need to fulfil my resolution of sleeping early...

Gloom..

Almost every other day.. as i lay on my bed preparing to sleep.. i'll stare into the darkness of my room.. the only lights that i can see are the following:
- glow-in-the-dark stars pasted all over the ceiling..
- glow-in-the-dark jigsaw puzzle given by anthony..
- glow-in-the-dark full human size skeleton given by my bro..

sometimes i wonder.. is life like what's before my eyes?? When everything else seemed so dark and gloomy, there's still something at the far end giving out a soft light.. like some form of hope... silently waiting by the side.. it sets me thinking.. do i have friends who'll stand by me no matter what happens? are they always there for me without me realising their presence? friends who have been there for me, many thanks.. i cant say how much i appreciate you guys/gals..

i am sad today. i feel like life have been snuffed out of me.. i wish i could cry.. but hardly any tears will come into my eyes.. is this good or bad?? feel kinda numb.. like a lifeless body drifting on a calm sea.. i have loads of frustrations.. but nowhere to vent them.. i dont wish to talk to anyone.. is there really a light at the end of the tunnel??

i tried hard to cheer myself up.. but the very next min.. i feel so punctured again.. my mind is weak.. my confidence all gone.. i feel like a mute.. i wish i could just disappear out of everyone's sight.. i wonder if anyone will notice my non-existence. *sigh* will i ever get myself out of this rut? this aint a good sign and i know..

i want to sleep.. to forget everything that's on my mind.. but my mind is racing with images.. with angry thoughts.. i cant shut it down.. it's like an engine running non-stop.. i wish someone can knock me unconscious.. so that my mind will stop thinking and my poor body can have a good rest..

i need to sleep.. i got to wake early tomorrow..

Sammi vs Sammi

I have finally seen Sammi! but it's been un unlucky day for me.. rushed to sammi's concert without dinner.. was late. really bad traffic.. jam on ECP.. jam @ cityhall area.. jam in all directions/routes heading towards the indoor stadium.. i wonder if everyone is heading towards the same way.. the car is inching more slowly than the clock ticking..my heart thumping faster every second..it's 8pm..

Here's a recap of my thoughts...

8.07pm - stuck at the car park at cosy bay! Darn! the car in front took the LAST available lot! was happily turning the vehicle into the carpark when the attendant told me to stop and told me that there are NO more lots for me.. looked far across the river.. there's still jam at the indoor stadium carpark.. line of yellow lights waiting to turn in.. waited right outside the carpark.. hoping someone will leave soon..

concert is supposed to be at 8pm.. stomach growling.. havent had dinner.. getting frantic by the second..

8.17pm - should i do illegal parking? it's double yellow line.. $70.. that's the fine. f**k the car.. should have taken public transport.. it didnt help sitting in the car waiting for time to pass.. and i need to go to the ladies.. argh.. heck it.. decided to park at the road side after 10 mins of comtemplating.. $70 vs $260.. $70 sounds little.

kinda half ran to the stadium.. i need a drink.. need food.. ladies!! didnt find any food or drink counter.. went to the ladies and headed towards east gate.. where's east gate?? *dazed* so many people around!!

finally found east gate... check bag.. and 7-11 counter!! that's the happiest thing i saw in the last one hour.. food.. $4 sandwiches!! grabbed.. that's how hungry i am.. grabbed drinks.. and donut as well.. now, where's the seats??

Thank god that the concert hasnt started.. *relieved*

Anyway, here's my personal review of the concert - not exactly fantastic.. and wasnt what i was expecting..

firstly, i cant really understand a lot of cantonese and everything was in cantonese.. sammi was speaking in cantonese almost all the time coz the fans shouted loudly and wanted it in cantonese.. Argh!

secondly, no canto pop songs, not much dancing.. only 2 chinese songs..

thirdly, didnt hear any of the songs that i wanted to hear.. *sigh*

lastly, poor sammi.. kept forgetting her lyrics.. hee..

somehow, it's still a great experience for me... took some pictures.. will load them when my com is up.. *sigh* i miss my com!!

Meetings fever??

I dun believe this.. i seemed to be in meetings all the time these days.. that also means more work.. more contribution.. more involvement.. and of coz, more commitment.. Should i be happy or sad?

slept 3 hours last night (dun ask me y!) and woke up this morning feeling weird.. and yes.. my throat is inflammed ONCE again.. darn!

well.. guess it's bedtime for me..

Meetings.. meetings.. and meetings..

apparently i have gotten quite sick of meetings.. but today's meeting was pretty interesting.. from a discussion of a strawberry ice cream cake & some cake testing, azelia & me managed to steer the discussion towards 5 day work week.. hahah.. guess what.. at the end of the session, my office is going to implement alternate saturdays OFF!!! Yeah!!! Most of the people in the office were rejoicing at this piece of great news.. azelia and me were both BEAMING.. we argued our case in the meeting room.. and were really satisfied when a change was decided!!
Wooohoooo!!! *jumping for joy*

its a tiring day for me. kinda fell asleep for a while after lunch.. felt so lethargic. i guess i didnt sleep enough the night before.. was tossing and turning once again..

dead beat..

am on half day leave today.. but ended feeling more tired than compared to a normal work day.

1st reason - i slept for less than 3 hours the night before. 2 phonecalls came in the middle of the night and it kinda shocked me and altered my sleeping mood.. after which i spent the next 2 hours turning and tossing in bed..

2nd reason - i had to rush to meet michie and jac for the collection of the gown in the afternoon, rushed through lunch but ended up late for the appointment at creative district..

3rd reason - my already heavy bag isnt helping to the load i had to carry after the collection.. my shoulders are so tired the whole day. wished i could dump them somewhere..

i was rushing around like a busy bee for the whole of today.. here's what i did and the places i went..
home - office
(late for work as usual)
office - raffles place
(early but met tommy and chat for quite a while)
raffles place - kopitiam
(rushed through lunch coz late for appt)
kopitiam - creative directory
(spent more than an hour there coz jac was late)
creative directory - wholesale place @ south bridge road
(wanted to buy clips and searched a few stores to find the right one)
wholesale place - olympus service center
(got to collect my spoilt camera.. *sigh*)
olympus svc center - keppel bay tower @ harbourfront
(got to send raphael's camera in for repair @ canon svc center)
keppel bay tower - harbourfront mall
(ate dinner)
harbourfront mall - raffles city
(accompanied mich to the fashion show.. wah.. got goodie bag.. *drool..)
raffles city - plaza sing
(sat down for some ice cream waffle.. rested my legs n hands/shoulders)
plaza sing - home sweet home
(stand throughout the whole darn journey home on the train.. with all the bags!! *body aching badly*)

Here are some of the findings for the day..
1. it weird to be wearing a mortar board, and its hard finding one with the correct size!
2. it's really expensive to take graduation photos in a studio.. wah.. it's like almost 400 for errmm 4-5 photos?
3. it's never worth the price for anything that has got to do with graduation.. enlarging a photo from 3R to 8R cost $40!! *faint*
4. i look weird in a graduation gown!!
5. there's nothing really in harbourfront mall.. almost ALL the shops seems to be in some form of renovation at this point of time. mostly food-related stores are opened at the moment..
6. you dont need to be pretty to be a model, just need to have the height..
7. models' figure aint really great, they have cellulites too!!

i would like to take this opportunity to thank michie, jon, and jac for accompanying me the whole day.. and running around the island like a mad dog.. and especially to jon for being so cranky and making me laugh so much at gelare today.. haha.. it was fun hanging out with you three.. till we meet again next week.. let's work hard and look forward to our graduation!!

i kinda made some resolutions for myself recently.. i want to make it a point to sleep early.. i have been neglecting my health and not sleeping much.. been falling sick too often.. i also want to make it a point to do my work well.. and excel in what i can do.. i want to save money.. aiming to reach my 20k goal in the next 2 years.. last but not least.. i'll clear up my room soon.. it's filled with loads of shopping bags that i havent had the time to unpack.. (imagine the amount of $$ i spend on shopping...........)

lazy weekend..

I practically slept the whole of the weekend away. Wanted to help wei with his report, but i couldnt fight off the "Z" monster.. argh!

met up with egon last saturday.. Boy, you have changed a lot!! anyway, i do hope you have enjoyed yourself and once again, HAPPY 21ST BIRTHDAY!! it makes me feel really old when i was there at the party at east coast.. wei and i were among the oldest in the crowd.. gawd, we had a hard time clicking with the rest..

i finally collected sammi's concert tics on sunday.. as the day inches nearer, im getting more and more excited.. and at the same time more and more worried.. it's gonna be wei's accounts closing day that day.. and i wonder if he'll be able to make it in time for the concert.. *pouts*

nothing special happened at work today.. only that i received a pleasant surprise from wei in the morning..

i'm gonna collect my graduation gown tomorrow!! yeah!! finally the BIG day is coming.. woo hoo!! i wonder how i'll look it in.. *anticipating..

SUPER demoralizing saturday..

i'm blogging from my office.. and yes.. i'm still in the office at this time. Just managed to finish my work and rest a bit and thought i might as well blog now since i will be out for the whole day later.. or rather.. the whole weekend.

i'm supposed to be OFF today, but due the launching of a new strawberry ice cream cake early next week, im have so many things to prepare that i decided to drag myself out of my bed, and head towards the office even tho i had only 3 hours of sleep..

it's been a shitty day. sometimes i just dont understand human nature. emotions change faster than the wind direction and friendliness can change to curt exchanges in just seconds. it's like, before i can finish blinking my eyes.. im in deep shit before i know it..

im super demoralised with all the things that needs to be done, and everyone is like bugging.. hey.. 12.30pm.. time to go.. let's go.. shouldnt you be going? deep in my mind i was wondering.. wtf! i have things to do, if you want to go.. just go! i mean, i'm free to use my own time to my own disposal and i dont need people to tell me to go home! and give me weird expressions when i mentioned that they can go first.

i want to shout.. i want to vent my frustrations.. but there's no place for me to do it.. right now.. im banging on my keyboard coz that's the only source of release for my frustrations at this very point of time.

i know im not supposed to be angry.. frustrated.. it's just not worth the effort.. the time.. the energy.. i'm trying hard to keep my cool.. *takes a deep breath*

I do hope my day will be well.. hopefully not get into trouble with anyone else.. and if i really did.. im so sorry..

Oops.. i got to leave the office already.. no one is left and the door is suppposed to be locked soon..

Will try to blog again on sunday night when i'm back home.

Long meeting.. & revitalised!

I didnt really work today. was in a meeting with the MD today since 11am till 4+ in the evening.. those who know me should know i wont be able to sit still for long.. Gawd, how miserable i was!! fidgeting throughout the meeting.. and i couldnt help it! and if you realised it by now.. i didnt go for lunch.. almost died of hunger in there!! came out and went for my lunch cum dinner, came back, packed my bag and headed home..

my attention span is short. i dont think i absorb much after the first hour.. but i appreciate the time taken to spend some time on us.. to let us know the history of the company and what has happened in the past.. our vision in the future..

there are some things that i learnt/got reminded of during the meeting..
1. One must have faith in carrying out tasks.
2. Motivation comes from oneself.
3. Trust is an important factor in people relations.
4. Do not let the negativity cloud your drive/passion.
5. Always live today like its e last. Appreciate e things u have n people ard u.
6. Persevere in what you believe.

well.. all i could say is that i'm definitely much more motivated before i went into the meeting.

it got me thinking about wei too.. i think he's damn stressed now that he started on his degree course. coupled with his current job, i think it's snuffing the life out of him. i hardly hear from him too.. i'm sad, but i'm not angry. i feel it's important to enrich ourselves with more knowledge..especially in our cut throat society now.. but i think it's hard when u have to do it together with a tough job. Dar, hang in there alright? I'll try my best to give you all the support you need. Soon, it'll be over.. Persevere.. remember, the tough times dont last.. the tough people do.

Boring..

I'm e x t r e m e l y B O R E D in the office..

Blogging..

Ever wondered why people blog? is it so to let the world out there know about the happenings of one? is it so to educate people of certain views? is it a medium to spread teachings of others? or is it just a place to pen down frustrations, ease anger, share stories with friends/relatives.. or is it a place to enhance whatever creativity juice one have? i mean, it can be accessed anywhere in the world.. and why would people want to have that kind of transparency??

saw the straits times last sat and there was this upcoming article abt a blogger on sunday times.. i didnt get to see the article (no newspaper subscription at home..), but i went to check the blog out.. Hmm.. i dunno what to say.. a little fascinating (with the kind of stories that she churned out).. a little impressed(with the amount of effort she spends at her blog)..but i didnt really think it's really fantastic.. but well.. guess she put in much more effort than i did to make it aesthetically appealing.. (i'm not mentioning the blog address coz i think she had have enough publicity already..)

I dunno abt others.. but i seldom read blogs of strangers.. I hardly have the time to.. i started my blog with the only sole purpose to share my USA trip with my close friends.. to still keep in contact with them via some link and keep them updated on the happenings that happened to me during my 3 week stay there.. and amazingly, i managed to keep the blog thus far..

i have never really wondered why i bothered to maintain the blog after so long.. consciously blogging in entries after entries.. most of the times, i used it to update friends of things around me..sometimes i wonder who reads my blog.. i know michie & Jac does read them frequently.. i know coz they will ask me if i didnt blog any entries.. hee.. i know xiaoqiang used to read it too.. but im not so sure now.. i wonder whether wei reads my blog.. i think some of my friends check my blog out for their pictures..i wonder if people whom i dunno abt reads abt my blog..i mean, i know of a lot of people that have my blog addy.. but they never leave any comments or trace when they visit it.. i wished i had a detector to detect who came into this blog to read.. at a frequent basis?? It'll be nice to know.. the names to the people who read what im writing..

Oh shucks.. it's 3 plus.. gawd, time for bed..

Train of thoughts... LOST!

Wanted to blog the moment i go home.. Used my bro's computer(he's on reservist!!).. checked my emails as usual... i dunno what happened.. i don't remember how.. i found myself waking after long nap.. and i stared hard at my blogger screen and cant remember what i wanted to blog initially.. argh..

Anyway, i just bought myself an expensive book.. Cutting edge advertising by Jim Aitchison. 2 words: Interesting & Enriching. Aiming to finish it soon..

Motivation..

sometimes i feel like a punctured tyre.. you know, life is never smooth sailing.. there are bound to be ups and downs.. a cheerful girl cant be cheerful 365 days a year.. a happy person cant be happy all his or her life.. I had a friend.. who once scolded me for not knowing how fortunate i am.. the kind of life that i'm leading.. the environment that i'm being blessed with..and scolded me for feeling down..

you know what i think? no one can judge another person's life through blog entries.. you'll never know what has happened behind all these words.. all these typing.. i can draft a pretty story here and be feeling really miserable behind the scene.. similarly, i can be painting a really sad and miserable story and be grinning while typing.. so please, dont cast your assumption and judgement too soon..

what a down person needs is encouragement and words of hope.. tho it is true to a certain extent that no one can help yourself but oneself in such situations.. being a encouraging friend at the side is definitely more welcomed than anything else.. of coz.. i would really appreaciate it if someone* would support me through and pull me out.. hee.. i wonder if that someone* caught the hint..

after more than a month on feeling demoralised on the job.. i'm beginning to feel a little energised now.. found a bit more motivation on the job coz the terms and condition on the appointment letter is gonna change! Yeah!! and i'm beginning to do what i really wanted to do.. all thanks to an understanding and fatherly figure in the company..

I'm not going to blog as often now that my computer is down.. hoping to fix it soon.. but that'll depends on when michie is free.. For now.. it's time to get back to my work..

Pink Tulips!!

i finally received pink tulips yesterday!! given to me by dear azelia.. hee.. so cute and sweet.. erm.. i meant the flowers.. haha.. will take photo when i bring them home tonight.. hopefully put them up soon once i get my computer fixed!

going for a swim tonight.. need to shed some fats. gained 3kg since i first joined the company.. :(

Sammi Cheng's Concert..

got to blog quickly in the office now that my computer is down. Bought sammi's concert tickets in the office yesterday! Yeah!

I'm gonna watch her concert!!! (with a big hole in my pocket of coz..) :(

Fu*k!

Damn pissed. i have a thing against technology this year. 1 month old computer half dead. i cant open any applications!! neither can i use windows explorer! spoilt 2 computers and 2 digital cameras this year already. Argh! what can i say..

can't blog frequently anymore, cant upload pictures into my computer either. feeling damn sucky.

*shouts*

Birthday Celebration photos..

Been trying to to recuperate from my sickness.. kinda stretched coz everyone seemed to wanna meet up.. kinda in celebration mode too.. partied too hard.. still really sick now.. suffering from headache too. *cough cough*

here are some of the shots taken on 4th august.. the day wenjing and me decided to celebrate our birthday together..

More photos of bintan trip..

work.. met Raphael & victor.. Met jac.. shop.. buy.. spend.. broke.. home..

i battled against weariness and sickness to do this collage.. more photos of the bintan trip..





more pictures will be uploaded.. but i need to get them from shannon and ivy.. :)

it's time to play with "z" monster.. i'm beginning to REALLY dread saturdays... work work and work!!

Bintan trip..

here are some of the photos that i have taken on the trip last weekend.. am too tired to upload all of them... here's half.. will upload more when i'm feeling better.. throat is killing me for the moment and eyes are closing..



there are more photos to come.. so check it out in a few days' time!!

Somehow this is rather different

Saw this on jac's blog and thought it was interesting..

Put an X next to the option you identify yourself with..

[ ] I wish I was a different ethnicity.
[x] I have an eating disorder.
[x] I am short.
[ ] I am tall.
[ ] I think I'm really attractive.
[x] I prefer winter over summer.
[ ] I am a geek.
[x] I am a shopaholic.
[x] I am reasonably intelligent.
[ ] I am attracted to girls.
[x] I am attracted to boys.
[x] I like British accents.
[ ] I smoke regularly.
[ ] I smoke socially.
[x] I drink socially.
[ ] I drink regularly.
[ ] I get drunk easily.
[ ] I do drugs.
[ ] I will never date a bad kisser.
[ ] I've lied to avoid kissing them again.
[ ] I brush my hair at least 50 times a night.
[ ] I am religious.
[x] I am not religious but have morals.
[ ] I lie frequently.
[x] I am impulsive.
[ ] I am hardworking.
[ ] I liked Eternal Sunshine Of The Spotless Mind.
[ ] She's All That is one of my favourite movies.
[ ] I am good at History.
[x] I speak more than two languages.
[x] I enjoy taking pictures.
[x] I like spending money on myself.
[x] I like spending money on others.
[x] I have a regular income.
[ ] I earn money on a job-by-job basis.
[ ] I pay my own bills.
[ ] I rely on my parents for money.
[x] I can cook.
[ ] I enjoy cleaning.
[ ] Tidyness is a must in my life.
[ ] I like clutter.
[ ] My idea of good music is Britney Spears.
[ ] I have heard of Blonde Redhead.
[ ] I enjoy Blonde Redhead.
[x] I am fashion-conscious.
[x] I have good taste.
[x] People tell me I have good taste.
[ ] I excel academically.
[x] I am told I have yet to fulfill my potential.
[x] I am good at sports.
[ ] I am good at certain sports.
[ ] I couldn't do sports to save my life.
[ ] I am creative.
[x] I am artistically inclined.
[ ] I want to be an artist when I grow up.
[ ] I want to be an engineer when I grow up.
[x] I eat when I'm upset.
[x] I eat when I'm happy.
[x] I cannot adapt to change.
[ ] I am interested in politics.
[x] I download MP3s.
[x] I have done underaged drinking.
[x] I have gone underaged clubbing.
[x] I can dance reasonably well.
[ ] I can dance extremely well.
[ ] I dance like a cardboard gorilla.
[ ] I can sing.
[x] I sing like someone stepped on my foot.
[x] I can swim.
[ ] I enjoy surveys.
[x] I enjoy surveys when I'm bored.
[x] I keep a journal.
[ ] My teachers don't like me.
[x] I enjoy controversy.
[x] I can be a bitch/bastard.
[ ] I have a thing for bad boys/girls.
[ ] I have tattoos.
[ ] I've been in a nudist colony.
[ ] I'm not sure if I want to have children.
[ ] I'm not sure if I'll get married.
[ ] I know who i'll marry.
[x] Someone has a crush on me.
[x] I am interesting.
[ ] I am a good liar.
[x] People enjoy talking to me.
[x] I annoy people from time to time.
[ ] I am a born leader.
[ ] I am a born leader but shouldn't lead.
[x] I've snuck out of the house.
[ ] I enjoy felching.
[ ] I have a foot fetish.
[x] I have a shoe fetish.
[ ] I watch Sex And The City.
[ ] I don't think Sarah Jessica Parker is pretty.
[ ] I want to be J Lo. HAHAHAHAHAHA
[ ] I cut myself.
[x] I have cut myself.
[x] I hate people who pretend to be suicidal.
[ ] I hate popular people.
[x] I think cheerleading is a sport.
[ ] I am photogenic.
[ ] I live in Chucks.
[x] I think graffiti is art.
[ ] I have dated a criminal.
[x] I have been cheated on.
[x] I have cheated on someone.
[x] I have a temper.
[x] I like playgrounds.
[x] I dance in the rain.
[ ] I am obsessed with Shakespeare.
[x] I have tanlines.
[x] My favourite color is pink.
[ ] My favourite color is black.
[x] I would classify myself as emo.
[ ] I am musically inclined.
[x] I like listening to music.
[ ] I like music-blasting cars.
[x] Thongs are comfortable.
[x] I like flip-flops.
[x] I know what monogamy is
[x] ... and I believe in it.
[x] I want to be a social worker when I grow up.
[x] I have siblings
[ ] My siblings is fun.
[ ] If someone would like me.
[x] I am lonely.
[ ] I love OC

Sick Girl on my birthday.. How SUcky!!

Woke up feeling really tired.. went to work and fever was brewing in my body.. throat was badly inflammed. wanted to work throughout the day but was really sick and shivering despite the shawl and jacket that i wore.

took half day mc.. had fever and went to the doc's.. got 2 days mc.. but i think i might go work tomorrow. still on probation.. no pay for medical leave.. i'l miss the money.

fever came and went. stayed home and rested all evening.. met anthony for dinner at northpoint. it's quite a boring day.. no cake to cut.. no candles to blow.. no birthday wishes.. a bit dull compared to my past birthdays.. but oh well.. it's gonna be over in 50 mins.. feeling the fever coming back again..

going to bed soon.. :(

Tulips.. !!!!

here's the tulips that wei gave me for my birthday.. Awww.. so SWEET.. it simply reduced me to tears.. tho they arent in my favourite color. but dar, it's the thought that counts and i want you to know that i'm really REALLY touched!! it simply makes me adore you more..

Happy Birthday to me.. myself..

This is the day when i was BORN in tan tock seng hospital 24 years back..

Happy Birthday to me..
Happy Birthday to me..
Happy Birthday to myself..
Happy Birthday to mE!!! *clap clap*

now that i finished singing, anyone interested in giving me presents??

"I"

I am not: the dainty kind of girl

I love: my orange doggy.. my boy.. snooker... and mahjong!!

I hate: liar, unfaithful people, people who backstab..

I fear: leaving this world without having the chance to bid goodbye to my loved ones..

I hope: to lead my dream lifestyle..

I hear: the TV, the people playing basketball downstairs and people shouting..

I regret: spending all the money that i've spent.. So BROKE NOW!!

I cry: over matters of the heart.. when im feel super depressed and demoralised..

I care: for people around me.. my friends.. my family..

I always: complain, complain and complain...

I believe: in fate, in luck and determination..and happiness lies in one's own hands..

I feel alone: in my room, in the dark..

I listen: to FM 93.3, to the sounds of the night.. to people who talk some sense..

I hide: my most innermost thoughts all the times.. i try to project a lively, happy image but sometimes.. i just feel so punctured..

I sing: like shit.. i'm beginning to suspect i'm tone deaf.. Arghh.. anyone wants to teach me? :(

I dance: only when i feel like it.. that hasn't happened for quite a long time.. haha..

I write: my blog.. my organiser.. cards for my boy..

I play: snooker.. beach volley.. mahjong.. many other.. too many to list..

I dun play: *cracking my head*.. are there things that i dun play? cant think..

I miss: school life.. the days when i live my life to the fullest...

I search: for a goal in my life.. a destination that i want to reach.. a life that i'll enjoy..

I feel: really excited and touched now.. (i just received a bouquet of TULIPS!!!) *tears flowing..

I know: that i'm falling sick soon.. i can feel it.. (how sad.. sick on bdae..)

I say: the wrong things at the wrong time ALL the time!!

I succeed: in spending all my money all the time..

I fail: to grow up.. to be more mature.. more understanding as a gf..

I dream: of a tai tai lifestyle.. (the thought of working tomolo irks me..)

I wonder: if someday my life will turn out as i dream it to be..

I want: a great bday, great friends and great life.. many presents too!!

I have: many things.. much more than i need.. but i still want MORE.. hee..

I give: love to only one, joy to all i can, care to those who need it..

I fell: many times.. in a lot of the things that i do.. but none too major to wake me from my dream.

I hurt: myself all the time.. accident prone.. bo pian.. clumsy means clumsy..

I tell: thanks to all those that wished me bday via hp, msn, icq etc..